Support, But Do Not Spoil

Just like I was  looking for moral and financial support when I started my career, many youngsters need support from people who are established. I have been an active participant in trying to provide similar assistance and support, to the best of my means and limitations, for the last 20 years.  It is a pleasure to share a couple of experiences I learnt out of my experiences on matters of financial assistance.

Majority of the people who seek help come with genuine repayment plans and fulfill their commitments on time.  It is always a pleasure extending support to persons with such an attitude. If the loan is for commercial purposes, there is nothing wrong for the lender to have a fair return, as the objective of the loan was to earn money.

If the loan is for an essential nature, I consider providing assistance ‘free of interest’ as getting them out of the financial strain is an adequate satisfaction.  But the borrower should realise that the lender has given the help depriving himself of the earnings that he otherwise would earn on that amount.

However, I have experienced that this ‘interest free’ tag has a  negative effect.   In such cases, the borrower instead of being grateful for receiving concessions, unfortunately, feels that it was his ‘right’ to have received that assistance.  In certain cases it was taken for granted as a gift.  Besides the borrower conveniently takes the repayment of interest-free loan as a last priority, as it doesn’t cost him to delay the repayments.  In most of the cases, the borrower avoids talking to lender as he considers it is the duty of the lender to ask for money.  In some cases, because of the relationship in question, the lender does not talk about it, converting “good money” to “bad money”.

Who is responsible for this?  The borrower?  No. My experience says, it is the me the lender’s fault, for very many reasons.

  • First of all, the loan given was emotion-based and not merit based
  • Secondly,  I mis-judged the borrower, in his attitude
  • Thirdly, I reduced the value of money, by giving the loan interest free
  • Fourthly, if the loan was given for non-essential purposes, I helped the borrower in  investing the funds for non-productive purposes.

Thus I was the one who spoiled them.  I could have been wiser in taking the borrower in confidence by explaining that I value my relationship with him and wish to avoid misunderstandings in future citing Shakespeare, “neither a lender nor a borrower be.”

Had I said a firm “No” and avoided getting emotional, I could have saved them and their deterioration in quality of attitude.  Above all I could have retained my relations with them!

Written: Badri Baldawa

Edited: Meeta Kabra

This entry was posted in Biography, Business, Family, Finance, My First Lessons and tagged , , , by badri. Bookmark the permalink.

About badri

As I approached 68 (2013), my son, Anand insisted that I had proven enough in my 45-year long career and it was time I took life a little easier; enjoy traveling (that I love) and social life. Yet, I somehow wanted to contribute positively and was exploring my options. My son-in-law, Navin suggested that I should write and share my experiences, “being a self-made man, you should tell the next generation how you overcame various obstacles to reach this position, in both, business and social circles.” He pointed out that while I was sharing my experiences with family and friends, as they approached me, a blog had the potential to take your voice to many, many more. He also insisted that I start mentoring youngsters who were new in their businesses. I was convinced. I offered my services pro bono, as part of a Guidance Program. Also, I started writing on this blog, bringing out figments from my memory as experiences that might be of value to the readers here. My daughter Meeta is sweet enough to spare her time to edit what I write. As a youngster, I thought one meal a day, one set of school uniform a year, a public place to study, lack of finance and basic shelter would keep me from achieving my dreams. To compensate, I started giving 110% of what was normally expected. Yes, 110% even in bad deeds! This worked. The very limitations started inspiring me in different phases of my life – meritorious results in studies; strength to shoulder family responsibilities; satisfied employers; establishing a successful business of my own; and in my adventure trips and other travel plans. Having done what I wanted to, I agreed it was time for me to expose myself! I felt, through this blog, I could and should share my expereinces. Hopefully, readers would find some bits useful and if not, they’d enjoy reading. Look forward to interact with you. Happy Reading, Badri Baldawa

3 thoughts on “Support, But Do Not Spoil

  1. Way to go sir, more power to your thoughts, more ink to your pen and more inclination to your mind so that you can keep on guiding youngsters

    all the best

    Jagan
    2 Aug 2014

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